Everything for the internal Business Plan 2020 campaign is online now, except the video. I’ll record that today.

When that’s online, we’re in Phase 1, which ends when the countdown clock on the home page ends. Then we’ll either be happy Fangyists or I will not be alive anymore. Because why are we wasting time in this system we can’t wait to distance ourselves from?


I’ve spent all of yesterday writing the business plan. And cooked nice(eee *heart eyes*) pasta. And edited this website and LilFangs.com’s home page.

I’d like to take back what I said about my mother being assistant. It’s best if I don’t take relatives into this at all. The Bz excluded if he turns out to be my father. I spent too much time, though having silently unblocked her on whatsapp, frustrated about an e-mail, I decided not to respond to for now. Now is not the time to be mentor-ish (it neverrrrr is when one speaks to me seriously I do not like that), but I don’t want to start an argument via e-mail. That is a waste of time and palpitations.

Right now I’m enjoying a cup of tea. Great. Relaxing. As much as possible. My apartment still has drying clothes everywhere. And undone dishes. But the business plan is finished. πŸ˜€ I’ve even read it twice before uploading it!!! (I usually don’t do that. Bad meee.)

Kicking my Feet up

The timer on the home page runs as I will be chilling for a couple of days. I’m exhausted from all of these days of restless nights web editing. So I’ll be die hard chilling for a couple of days, hoping to focus on jazz chords and video games. And finally visit that park if it stops storming. Maybe look at vacancies because I need money and I’m so tired of starving. It is pointless for me to attend lectures. Hopefully I will be processing Fangia payments for Phase 1 instead.

I’n crazy tired meoww good night liefjeee β™₯


P.S. Aargggg yukkk I just saw I wrote “safe a life” instead of “save a life” (guess I hope to be helped so much that I listened to my slight convincement telling me I’m safe now). I can’t change that via my mobile phone, so I’ll get to that tomorrow my meow I am very tired.

P.P.S. Reminder-to-self that I do not flush until in the afternoon, otherwise I’ll get my downstairs neighbor in trouble. Yays to me for answering the door unexpectedly without feeling anxious at all. πŸ™‚

00:00 (12:00 AM) [CET]; Kievitwijk, Antwerp

Good morning πŸ™‚ β™₯

My night was really good. And I’ve had breakfast (half of my left over pasta) already. And I’ve washed my wig. Though I wanted to do that yesterday, I pulled through working on the business plan. In a few, I’ll be washing my own hair. Usually I’m not this productive in the morning, voluntarily. πŸ™‚

I hope you’ve had a good night as well. I don’t know if to you this sounds as good as I feel/want it to, but I hope the 2020 business plan and initiation of the Fangia is a relief to you as well. A physical reminder that the things we dislike have their permanent end in sight.

Something I look forward to a lot today is having a reason to wear formal clothing and film. πŸ™‚ And I’ll make a PowerPoint for on my laptop screen to use as teleprompter when I’m filming. πŸ™‚ It’s yays for things I enjoy doing. Unfortunately I’m doing it by myself. But it’s yays for my creativity. May it pay off.

I’ll be washing my hair, folding laundry, preparing the videos, having lunch, washing dishes, filming and enjoying final left overs for dinner.

Have a nice day πŸ™‚

Kusjeee β™₯


P.S. For real though please do not let the timer run out meow that does worry me. πŸ™

09:43 (AM) [CET]; Kievitwijk, Antwerp

My hair is washed, the laundry is stored, I’ve had eggplant left overs for lunch.

I played Amaze from level 400something to level 600 to distract myself from surfacing emotions

And I made this list of things I want to do here before I die

Unless you plan on intercepting me, I will be doing these things by myself. Need to select some spots to go to. It would have been planned better for after the 24th because that is when I get paid my monthly student loan.

But if people don’t act upon my content by the weekend, why would they do it after the weekend? I don’t know if I should delay the countdown timer. For loving myself, though, I should postpone the timer to the last weekend of February.

After napping until 3 PM. πŸ™‚

Kusje β™₯


13:43 (01:43 PM) [CET]; Kievitwijk, Antwerp

I’m still tired so I’m going to postpone my nap timer to 5 PM.

Rivierenhof is planned for Friday. The yays. πŸ™‚

My situation is getting closer to when I dropped out in 2017 and the psychiatry stuff started. The difference with right now, though, is that I won’t approach anyone personally with business offers, to save us the headache. As long as I act normal when I’m outside here and don’t visit people in the Netherlands, I don’t have to fear psychiatric surveillance. And I’m not smoking my troubles away with weed.

The authorities (including family) start acting up when I stop living towards the 9 – 5 future, though. I need money but I don’t want to earn that with things that make me unhappy. So I’m not going to apply for jobs and just give the waiting suspense for Phase 1 until the 29th of February. Hoping that people will buy Fangia and with that make my words on this blog the happiest ever.

I’ll be napping x

15:53 (03:53 PM) [CET]; Kievitwijk, Antwerp

Damn I slept through everything. πŸ™ I just woke up. And still feel tired. I ate a muesli bar to silence my growling stomach. Now I’m going back to sleep. Sorry liefje. I promised to do this today, but my body won’t let me. πŸ™ β™₯

I’ll see you in my dreams.


23:57 (11:57 PM); Kievitwijk, Antwerp